Wahala

 Oftentimes he would sit me with him under shade, at his favorite spot behind the house in the evening. Palm wine horn sitting comfortably on a chair, some portion in his favorite mug, he'd raised it to the door of his mouth while I watched as some volume gushed down his throat. Meanwhile, last Sunday, now two days ago, my church pastor in his sermon, like John the Baptist in the wilderness, blared out, saying 'anything drinks that can plunge you into misbehaving, it's not good for Christian' . God knows if he heard him, for he can't stop claiming to be a good Christian. Meanwhile, for him, palm wine is like hard gin mixed with Vodka, it possesses like demons.

Today, it's not only to watch him draining the hornful of wine, but also to listen to some old songs sneaking out of his Tecno phone, which I can't find their rhythms with my disco and hip-hop ears and head. Yes, suppose it's fireboy, or brymo etcetera. In no time I would have caught the momentum of the songs and set my mouth into singing.

Nevertheless, I am watching. Since that seems to be my work now, however in my mind I had long disappeared into the streets. Hallelujah! He clears his throat as though a sticky substance has blocked it. If one could listen to the sound fashionably well, it sounds like what those arrogant Don in gangster movies used to do with their huge smoldering marijuana hung at the tip of their mouths. He lifts what seems to be his last portion, half filled and gups it down. I could hear his throat making sound, funny sound.

Thereafter, he clicks his mouth. And commence speaking: Ajibade, You see, our God is not harsh. Suppose you know how close my relationship with God is. You would be proud to be my son and wholeheartedly you'll listen to my gospel. Oh, you are smiling. You think I am drunk or I want to speak gibberish to you. But no! I just want to relay this reality to you, I want you to be a city of wisdom. Some think drinking palm wine is a sin, but my question is, are you wiser than God who created the palm tree? That's my question to them.

Ajibade, God knows me and very well, I know him. He knows men must enjoy themselves. I believe God will forever be laughing on his throne, seeing some taking away enjoyment from their lives. Do you know their anthem? Here it's - God doesn't like this, and this and that. At times I'll join God and we'll laugh together at mortals' naivety. I want to tell you that you should not remove enjoyment from your life and if you attempt to do, Ajibade, that's when you'll know how heavy the burdens of life could be. I hope that you embrace my gospel.

Also, I've taken my steps and thank Jehovah, you are a testimony to at least one of them. Aha, don't be surprised. On a clear note, you are one of the offspring of my steps in life. Your mother was one of the steps - yes, I remember my first sight of her, a beautiful lady bright as daylight. I could notice many guys running after which I am inclusive. That virtually I almost lost her to Alabi, who was a teacher by then. He was so fluent in English that with it, he could snap merely fingers and damsels would disobey their parents and follow him. Alabi was very close to your mother, but my love for her was deeper than exile. For I am deeply lost in her.

Don't let me smitten you with too much suspense, I could see your feet are not at ease again and your sitting position, can't you see you are nearly off the chair. Well, there are stories, then there is beautiful narration. Okay, since I knew Alabi has highly reputable communication skills, I also increased my money earning skills, coupled with money spending ability. Then we brewed a battle, and It was a battle of knowledge and money. And that's how we plunged your mother and her family into a dilemma of what to choose - money or English speaking skills.

I remember how I used to level the bills of food and palm wines drunk by people I met at the spot. I am known for my spending ability and thanks to the news carrier they didn't stop bombarding your mother's ears with my spending news. Guess what? - in no time, your mother started moving closer to me, Island. And the beginning of our love affairs. Ajibade, That's simply about women and money - your mother is no different. She loves money as much as others…

Ajibade, I don't want it to look to you as if I am drunk. So, this is the end of my story. I prostrated, but as I stood up to turn around from his presence, I saw my mother, sitting on a stool, I could see a whiff of anger in her face . She has been listening to our conversation… so, I walked silently away, a Little distance from her, I mumbled, "Wahala"